Human behaviour change due to time past

I still remember that time I was ignorance, I was 17 years old and I came out with sentences like this that

"Handphone is luxury for me, it was an excess for me. Even though without the handphone, I still can live in happy, the human in the past also can alive without the invention of handphone"

But now what my life is my handphone never away from me more than 10 minutes
How funny in this case, after all now I will ridicule my childish to say that sentense

Now I found that nothing is absolutely and I found myself change due to the time past
In the past, I were absolutely told you loudly and strongly believe that I will not change myself in anytime, I were the same as the previous, now and future
But now I will recall back the my stubborn bring me a lot of painful and wasted in time
Even though I still will said I am still the previous of myself to others, but the truth is I were change and not the exactly myself in the past so
In the past some of the mind and thing that I cannot accepted, now I able to open my mind and heart to accepted that and managed to come out from the column to analyze from different view

yesterday I went out to have my dinner. I saw it and bought this pairs of sandals for myself. In the past, I only wear the type of beach type shoes. Yet, I want to change to try on it wish it can bring me walk more further with comfortable. There is another pairs of shoes that I bought last Saturday for my work wear. Previously, I got a feel very rejected to wear this type of toes open shoes. I got a mind set that it was not suitable for me but that day I bought it because I want to try on new thing and feel want to open up a different face of myself.

Suddenly feel want to listen this song. This is a share to all the mood of this moment for me just like the song above.

One Year

one year, 365 days, 8760 hours, how were I spend it?
Suddenly I come in here, today I look back myself in the past
myself in a year ago, what is the mind that use to face the life
but last year, what i had in my mind last year was empty and blank
since when started, I were absentminded to spend my life

a year time is long enough for a person to face the change
since last year May started, I were trance for two months
what is the following in my life is only working and continuously working loud
how many weekend and holiday that I spend my life in numbness and confusion

a year time is long enough for a person to change a lot
a year time is long enough to let a lost person find the direction
a year time is long enough to let a person walk out from the sadness, face and continue the journey of their life

I want to fly

without realize that a week just pass away, my life was surrounding by unfinished of task
beside working, reading, learning, and outing others of my time was use to sleep
everyday i was repeating listen to a song sang by xu fei- i want to be fly
slowly i was walking out from the sadness and upset,i very like lyric for the chorus of this song

"never mind doesn't matter what is lost, will be no trace

every time let the tear flow back to my heart

to irrigation the dream and create the miracle

i want to be strong and is not a shoulder for rely

a embrace is a place that can stop me from moving forward

world is so crowned and rush

use all the lonely time to applause for ourselves

I want to fly in the sky but not to borrow a pair of wing from others

freedom is a place that can be measure with distance

with the journey alone to gain the growth"

this song let me find back the direction, i know i did my best
doesn't matter what is the result, at least i won't feel sorry to myself
i won't regret, won't sadness and sorrow, because that was life
doesn't means that you work hard you must get something that you wish
I will work hard to irrigation and realize my dream and open up the miracle in future of my life~~~

At least that is a memories for you to recall the past

This world is amazing and fantastic so, the nature is keep changing. World is full with all kind of endless changes possible happened. Favourite for moment now might become dislike in a second after, love for moment now might became a hate, is yours but might happened not belong to you in time of blinding your eye. Is all happened might just in a short time until you didn't realize and believe that can happened just in a short while. So, I never force myself to get something that not belong to me and never put any effort for something that not always be mine no matter is memories, thing or human. This doesn't means I was cruel, but is the time to change me and the environment make me grow up. Suddenly, I understand that once was so beautiful but we never got the chance to back to the past. If now that is what you like or love,used all your strength to like or love until one day, you realized that you no longer like or love, I believe at least that is a memories for you to recall the past

"You will getting marry earlier than me....."

Yesterday I hear a sentence that make me confuse and think serious on it "you will getting marry earlier than me....." this sentence was said from a friend. After listen to it, I feel that uncomfortable and this make my brain to start work again to think out why he said so. A lot of memory in my mind was recalled. I found that in the previous of our human life mostly is living under the situation that taking care of others people because we stated by the rule and the view of moral from society.

If we do never change our mind set, I think no matter the previous history for 10 years in your past or the future 10 years for your life that still the same situation. You are all the time living in the situation that always needed to take care of others. This not a easy task but is a kind of heavy responsible or burden for us. Some of the time even make yourself lost because you are putting your center of life on others not to yourself.

Suddenly, I found that who can be parents were great. They were sacrificed half of their life to take care of the children, to grow them up, to educate them. For me, that was a really burden task and responsible for me because in the previous 10 years i was the center of rely for others. So, I knew it that the responsible to let others rely is not easy. So, I decided that in the future of 10 years I don't wish that to be the rely for others and I won't be the burden rely to others also. I preferred to live happy and alone without any burden on my shoulder.