the sun just rise, suddenly felt as want a shoulder to lend on, but i know that is impossible to ask others lend a shoulder during this period. I realize that the reality does not allow me to self-wiled. this make me felt want to get some concerned from others to make me felt not lonely and no longer fight in a person. The vulnerable and afraid feel make me felt hate to myself which is totally different from the usual of myself.
pick up the phone, i just realize there is few people that could i to contact so. No one is willing my call, no one is sacrificed time from sweet dream to listen to me. Feel so pity to myself, the full list of the contact in the photo book is just like that. Finally, i phone the closest person to me------my mother.
~~~~BEEP~~~~BEEP~~~~BEEP~~~~
no one even pick.......my last hope is vanished in the air the same time. I forced to face the reality and continue memorize all the words that show in front of my laptop screen. I keep forcing myselg to fulfill with as much as i could in the brain. Tired~~tired~~~i m really tired~~~but keep forcing myself not to fall asleep and once again i try to press on the button and call to the same number.
The time that i again feel disappointing and thought want to hang up so, there is respond from another side. The voice from mum is warmed and calmed my heart. The nagging from her, the greeting from her, the concern from her totally fulfill my loneliness in my heart. This cause me no longer scare, no longer vulnerable, no longer panic, no longer hesitation. I lead to brave and face my own vulnerability~~~~
2 comments:
wah geng wor this picture also can fine ar...hehe....today is the last oil lampw we need to boil....for the sem..
kekeke...now only realize got comment...forget already long time....cute ah...if u wan cans end u so...kekeke
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